39w6d...Maely's Arrival!

Maelyn Grace made her appearance in the world at 10:41pm on January 24, 2013. She weighs 8lb 9oz and is 20 1/2 in long. I had the birth experience that I fought so hard for, and since I have shared so much about the last weeks of my pregnancy, I want to share my birth story to show that despite the heavily medical atmosphere that surrounds labor and delivery today it is still possible to have a wonderful, natural birth experience.

Wednesday night, I was so starving that no amount of food was satiating me. I ate until I was too full to eat anything else and went to bed. Around 2:30am, I woke up with a contraction. I laid in bed for a few minutes and felt another. I felt a little glimmer of hope that this might be the real deal since these contractions felt different than any I had experienced before. I timed my first one at 2:45 and got up to try to relax and watch tv. Contractions came steadily, about 7-8 minutes apart. At 4:00 I felt confident that today was going to be the day, and I started freaking out a little! The house was a mess so I started cleaning up to distract from the contractions. At 4:30, I woke up Seth and said "I think something is happening!" I told him to go back to sleep, but by 6 I couldn't stand it anymore, I wanted to get everything ready to go because I was pretty sure by then that this was it.

I took a shower and curled my hair so that it would stay out of my face during labor since my straight hair ponytails constantly fall down. Also, I had been telling Seth I was going to do this and he didn't believe me, so of course I had to prove myself!

I was so hesitant to call my parents or Charlotte, our doula, because I part of me kept thinking that this may not be the real thing, and I didn't want to be chastised for the rest of my life about a false alarm!

Around 11, the contractions started getting intense to the point that I had to stop and breathe through them, but could still function pretty well in between them. Seth finally made me call Charlotte and decided to have her go ahead and come over. Charlotte helped me better assess my progress, helped me get into the mindset to work through my contractions. Since it was so nice outside, Seth, Charlotte, and I walked around our property to get gravity working in my favor. 

I realized it was pot roast Thursday at Reid's, which I was not missing! Seth went and got me pot roast with lots of carrots, and I tailor sat on the floor watching Maury, stopping for contractions. I am so glad I ate this meal, I really feel like it gave me the strength to power through. I also think it gave my body the fuel it needed to really kick labor into high gear.

After eating, we did some work with the birthing ball to stay loose and stretched out, I took a "nap" to get a little rest before the hospital, and Charlotte gave me an awesome massage that allowed me to sleep between contractions for about an hour. I highly recommend having a doula who is also a licensed massage therapist to rub your back throughout your labor. So worth it!

By 5pm contractions were less than 4 minutes apart lasting consistently for a minute, so we decided it was time to load up and head to the hospital. Seth got the back of the truck ready - plastic drape over the entire backseat, towels, and blankets, just in case my water broke and/or we had to deliver on the way. I loaded up in the truck, and about 5 minutes on the road I realized we forgot the birthing ball so we had to turn around and get it, I could not be without it! The ball really did provide a lot of relief and helped me stay in a positive position.

I have always heard that riding in the car with the contractions is horrible, and while I agree that it wasn't the best thing I've ever experienced, I can remember laying there thinking "it's supposed to be so much worse than this, it doesn't hurt enough!". I actually thought this a lot throughout my labor. Not sure if this was because of all the mental prep work I had done, or just sheer disbelief that I was finally in labor.

Seth tried to drop me off at the front of the hospital so I wouldn't have to walk so far, but I refused. I did not want to be by myself. So I walked across the entire length of the parking lot, through two contractions, and finally made it to labor and delivery. Our sweet friends at L&D were getting a nice, big delivery room ready for us, which was awesome except that it meant I had to stand out in a packed waiting room, working through contractions while everyone was staring at me! By far, the worst part of my labor experience.

We got into triage finally, and I my progress was checked. I was at 4cm, which was not horrible but we were really hoping to be at a 7 by the time we got to the hospital. This is where Seth and I had to start being adamant about what I wanted, such as not wearing a hospital gown. These things may seem small, but it is all part of a bigger picture of being comfortable. Also, during the triage part, the Seth noticed that the nurse checked off a whole list of items that we did not want for the baby without even asking us. Luckily Seth was paying attention and was able to tell her to correct the form to reflect that we did not want Vitamin K, Hep B, etc.

When we got back to the delivery room, I got settled in. After Seth loaded all our bags in, I decided to get into the jetted tub to try and soothe some contractions. Well, that tub is way too small to get into any decent positions to work through contractions! However, I think the position I chose to sit in really helped open me up a lot, because I could not tolerate not being able to move through the contractions pretty quickly, and when I got out of the bath I was checked for progress and was at 7cm after an hour and half.

At that point, Charlotte had me get on all fours propped up over the back of the bed. This position totally prepared my body to push Maely Grace right out. I am not sure how long I was able to stay in this position, but it didn't feel like it was very long before I could not tolerate any position other than laying down. I so badly wanted to lay on my right side, but Charlotte just kept saying "left side, left side!", so I got as comfortable as I could on my left side.

From this point forward I truly don't remember much. I remember American Idol and Glee being on. I remember thinking that I was probably going to miss Scandal. I remember constantly reaching for Seth and freaking out if I couldn't hang on to him. Seth was so my comfort. I remember playing with his hair through a contraction. Like many women before me, I was not exempt from the self doubt that kind of pain will make you feel. I finally hit my wall and starting asking for the medicine. I know this was partially because I remember people talking around me about how I would probably not deliver until after midnight, and I can remember seeing the clock and it only being 9 something. All I could think was that I could not go on for several more hours at this level.

Charlotte and Seth held me off, reminding me that I didn't need it, that I had already made it this far and that I was doing it all by myself just fine. I do remember clearly crying for "the medicine" three times, and on the third time, our midwife, Suzanne, checked me around 10pm and I was at a 10! I think everyone was shocked that it was time to start pushing. Even then, Suzanne left to go check on another patient because she believed I would be pushing for a while based on the size of the baby.

All the things I have read and heard is that pushing is a relief, and that you can feel the urge to push down. I really couldn't feel the urge to push down until I started consciously pushing, and that's when the pressure came. This was really no relief to me, but Seth told me afterwards that I was much calming during this phase than the transition phase.
 
I feel like I didn't push for very long, and I know that my pushing was much more effective than anyone anticipated because our nurse got on the phone and frantically said "get Suzanne back in here NOW!". Suzanne came back in and at that point didn't leave my side. She started helping me through each contraction, and pushed with her finger the area that I needed to concentrate my pushing in. This is where I was so happy that I did not have an epidural. With an epidural, there would have been no way for me to feel this and to push so effectively.

I do remember thinking "this baby is not even close to coming out, it doesn't hurt bad enough, I don't feel the burning 'ring of fire'"! What I felt most was pressure, unbelievable, indescribable pressure.

I will that when I first started pushing, I tried to breathe through my pushes and I could not get a strong enough force between my pushes that way. Until I held my breath and pushed very hard, I wasn't make much headway. It took Maely 41 minutes to make her descension into this world.

I thought I made it out scot-free without any tearing, but I wasn't so lucky! Maely came with her elbow cocked out and tore the top side of my labia. No perineal tearing though, which was my major concern!

Maely came out perfect as she could be. She latched on like a pro 15 minutes or so after she was born, and we have been a nursing superpower duo ever since, which I fully credit to her being fully lucid when she was born, and unadulterated by bright lights, baths, shots, and eye goop as soon as she came out. She had no distractions and was able to focus on her goal of getting the best food nature could provide. I've had no supply issues as of 14 weeks postpartum.

The journey that Maely and I went on was magical, and I will cherish it for the rest of my life.